I'm a Memphian. And proud.

Over the course of my life I've spent in places other than my hometown of Memphis, TN, I frequently answer the common question asked of me by people I'm meeting for the first time. "Where are you from?" To which I logically reply, "Memphis." After I respond I am more often than not met with a grim look, a smirk, an occasional laugh or even a phrase like, "Oh. That must have been tough growing up there. It's such a wretched city."

Ok. So maybe I don't get that last one too often, but it's unmistakable that people who are not from Memphis have a very low opinion of it as a whole. And to an outsider, they should have that general consensus. The picture that the country and the media and books and movies all present of my town are extremely negative. Why shouldn't people think it's a craphole place to live?

Because it's not.

Sure our mayor (Yep. That's him.) King Willie Herenton may be as crooked as he is tall (6'6"). Our city's quasi savior, Tiger Basketball Coach John Calipari, may have left us for bluer pastures. Our public school system may be falling by the wayside. And our crime rates may be among the highest in the nation. But in all honesty, Memphis, my city, my hometown isn't all that bad, and I really am proud when I tell people where I grew up.

I understand that it's hard to see a silver lining in what most people see as the darkest of dark clouds, but there are unnumbered things in Memphis that look like rays of sunshine busting through those storm clouds. So for those of you that are Memphis skeptics, or in the words of our supposedly outgoing mayor, "haters" or for those of you that are in Memphis looking for some good to cling on to and be proud of, here you go.

Reneighboring. It may look like a typo, but it is a movement sweeping the city. Essentially reneighboring looks like this: Upper middle class families forgo the creature comforts of gated communities and the burbs and move into the dilapidated, rough areas of town in an attempt to help the community out, build bridges in a city still suffering from a severe racial divide and show people that because one neighborhood might be labeled as "bad" doesn't mean that it's impossible to live there safely and comfortably. It would be hard for me to do the whole concept justice in my short weekly rant, so if you want some more info regarding this new concept check out this article from The Commercial Appeal:

http://www.commercialappeal.com/news/2009/jun/28/where-would-jesus-live/.

I promise it's worth the read, more so than reading my words for sure. And I also promise that this is something worthwhile done by good people in Memphis that want to see our city change for the better.

Besides reneighboring, there are other things to be proud of in Memphis. How about our zoo? It may sound trivial, but it is unquestionably one of the top 15, if not 10, zoos in the nation. With the addition of the Pandas a few years back and the new Polar Bear exhibit, our zoo can contend with all of the big boys in this industry. Chicago, New Orleans and even San Diego are all great zoos, but Memphis is just as good as any of those. In all honesty, San Diego, the Mecca of the captive animal world isn't worth all the hype. It's too big, and Memphis has all the same stuff SoCal does. If you haven't been to the zoo recently, take a nice Saturday and give it a whirl. If you aren't in Memphis, check it out next time you go. It's well worth it.

http://www.memphiszoo.org/

Our downtown area has also been developing quite nicely since the addition of Autozone Park 10 years ago. Main Street is going through a nice resurgence. The Grizzlies and FedEx Forum provide great entertainment in the sports and music world. And Beale Street is still quite a destination for partiers and history buffs alike. Restaurant choices are becoming more and more plentiful and downtown now, as opposed to 15 years ago, is a great destination not just for young people looking to have a good time, but for families as well. With the movement of the University of Memphis Law School to the old United States Customs House and Post Office, look for the area to become a nice crossroads for the student and young executive world.

http://www.downtownmemphis.com/downtownmemphis/index.asp

Really, the list of great things happening right now in Memphis could go on and on, but I'll end it on this exciting and somewhat heartwarming note, once again to my embarrassment from America's Got Talent. If you've ever been on Beale when the Flippers flip down the street, you'll understand why the people in the audience from the following video can't help but stand up and applaud. It's an incredible sight to see, and it's great to know these kids can find something fun and productive to do so they can break away from the gang and crime infested ways that many of their peers and friends have succumbed to. Watch the video and enjoy it. Don't be surprised at the goosebumps you get when you see the crowd's reaction.

Thanks for reading again. I hope now you might have a small glimpse into the pride I feel when I tell people that I'm from Memphis...

Suit. No tie. Yes please.

Summer wedding season is here so needless to say, I've seen my fair share of fashion statements over the past month or so at ceremonies, receptions and rehearsal dinners. Linen, eh... Seersucker, too flashy... Plain charcoal, yawn... The obvious new trend that is exciting the wonderful world of male wardrobes however is "suit, no tie."

If you've turned on the TV in the last several months, you've probably seen our trendy new head of state sporting this look. So if the pres can do it while giving speeches, I don't see why some people frown upon it when it comes to semi-formal social gatherings.

I won't lie. I haven't sported this look too often. It's obviously meant for some people, and I'm not sure if I'm one of those some people just yet. I tried it once at a rehearsal dinner a few weeks back for the simple reason that I didn't have any other options as the wedding was out of town and I didn't pack appropriately, but the get up was met by mixed emotions. The younger crowd gave a unanimous voice of approval, but the older folks, no offense to you Baby Boomers out there, didn't directly express disdain, but shot me not so warm glances.

So is this new fashion statement a yay, or a nay? Let's explore.

First, the negatives.

1) Laziness:
Wearing a suit without a tie gives people the impression that you are too apathetic or lazy to pick out a coordinating tie to spice up your wardrobe and follow simple etiquette when it comes time to dress up. It may also give them the idea that you might be incapable of tying a tie which obviously screams, "UNCULTURED."

2) Leaves an outfit lacking:
Going out on a limb to stand out this way can also make you blend in by looking drab. A tie is the way a man stands out. People rarely remember a man's look unless he has on an eye grabbing tie. If you decide to go "suit, no tie" but don't pick out the appropriate suit and shirt, you stand a good chance of only being remembered as "that guy that didn't wear a tie." For example, "Did you see 'that guy that didn't wear a tie?' What a chad (slang for loser)." To pull this look off without having people say things like this, pick out a snappy shirt if you wear a solid colored suit, or pick out a patterned suit to mix with a solid shirt.

3) Maybe you're trying too hard:
Since this look is so "in" right now, if you try to wear it and aren't meant to, people again might think you look downright silly. You probably think, "Oh man, Jeremy Piven looks so bad ass on Entourage when he wears a suit without a tie so obvi (abreev for obviously) I will too." Wrong. Chances are if you're trying to look like an Entourage character and you don't normally dress like one, you're going to go overboard and appear at your party looking ridiculous. You likely will pick out an obnoxiously bright shirt and try to pair it with your drab charcoal suit. Trust me the result will be horrendous. Don't go all out first. Try "suit, no tie" simply and if you're met with a warm reception, get snazzier the next time.

Now the positives.

1) EVERYONE is doing it:
It's impossible to watch TV without seeing a celeb sporting this look. The aforementioned Obama and Piven. Timberlake, Kanye, Lebron, Phelps, Kobe, Bono, etc. are all being lavished with good press for dressing the way they do. If they are gracing the red carpet this way, then it's obviously OK for others to follow suit. But again, beware. Just because celebrities are doing it doesn't mean you HAVE to. There is a reason they are famous. They're attractive, and if someone tries to pull off the star look without having the aesthetic qualities to match, the result could be disastrous.

2) It says, "Hey. I'm cool.":
People that can pull off this trend often have that aloof, "I know I look good," quality. It says you're confident and dapper. It says, "Look at me. I'm a pretty person, and I can dress with the best of them."

3)You don't have to loosen your tie:
When the reception kicks in to full gear and the smooth sounds of Motown are being belted by the band, it's pretty annoying to have to loosen your tie, take it off and keep up with it or worry about some drunk chad (see above definition) spilling wine all over it and ruining it. If you don't wear a tie, none of those things have to cross your mind. You can groove all night without ever thinking twice about the sassy silk around your neck.

So here we are left with a decision to make. Tie, no tie? What is a boy to do? Here's my final word of wisdom. If you have a social function to attend that doesn't come with much pressure, give it a whirl. If it's met with compliments and second glances from those with the Y chromosome, try it again at your next big soiree. If you see people pointing and whispering, you know not to do it again. Like I said, this look is meant for some people but not for others. Maybe you're one, maybe not. But if you see me trying it and I look bad, just let me think I look good. It's the least you can do for me providing such great weekly entertainment for you.

Escaping the Recession... Summer Style

So Jay Leno is off the air for the time being, and I know you all miss his "the economy is so bad that..." one liners, so I figured that I'd give you a few to hold you over until his prime time show hits the air.

The economy is so bad that the Smirnoff Ice golf course slip 'n slide commercial actually looks like fun.

The economy is so bad that my first pay check tomorrow, at minimum wage mind you, will produce a high that will likely rival heroin.

The economy is so bad that elephants at the Memphis Zoo are killing their children for insurance rewards.

And finally...

The economy is so bad that you've actually made it this far into my blog.

But seriously, with the economy in the state it is, you are probably looking for things to do this summer that might save a buck or two. I know I am. So luckily, since I have ample time on my hands and a serious lack of money, I've researched a few thrifty options and feel it necessary to share them with you to help you out when you're looking for something to do this summer.

1) Happy Hour:
No this isn't just for those of you out there old enough to partake in adult beverages. Countless places have food and drink specials that usually run from four to seven or so everyday and can really make a difference in the check total. Don't get me wrong, the drink specials are great, but the food discounts are where the real money savings can be found. Some great examples of places to find such good deals are sushi restaurants, pizza parlors, hot wing joints and of course Sonic. If you find yourself getting bogged down by the sweltering summer heat, head to everyone's favorite neighborhood fast food joint and get slushes two for one, everyday from two to four.

However, if you are interested in adult bevs, I would suggest trying Dundee's Honey Brown. It's a quality beer with a great taste for roughly $7.99 a twelve pack.

2) Stay-cations:
While there are still some people out there that can afford to head to the Caribbean for a week long stay at a five star resort, most of us commoners are trying to find better, more cost efficient ways to spend our hard earned vacation time. So the logical choice is to stay home and relax. Find things to do in your own city or places nearby that you've never done before. I know that in my own home town, there are still tons of tourist destinations I have yet to visit or haven't visited in some years. Sure these things cost money, some more than others (Graceland is up to a cool thirty bones these days I believe.), but in the long run, going to a few places over the course of the week won't be nearly the fiscal burden that an out of town vacation would be.

3) Discount Theaters:
Of course everyone is excited to see Harry Potter or Bruno this summer, but at almost ten dollars a ticket plus the cost of popcorn, a drink and candy, you're looking at spending nearly thirty dollars to take your girl or guy to the movie (all for girls paying these days). So check the internet or those newspaper things that people sometimes still get for the reduced price cinemas. Most of the times they play movies that have been out for a few weeks, but they often include popcorn and a drink with the price of admission. Besides, who doesn't want to see Paul Blart: Mall Cop again?

4) Wal-Mart Hide and Seek:
Get some friends. Head to Wal-Mart or Target. Pick teams of two or three. Take ten minutes to find ten random items throughout the store. Give the items to the other team. Follow them around and time them while they attempt to put everything back in its original location. When they finish, let them find ten items and time you while your team puts them back. Fastest time wins. Losing team treats the winners to a Coke or a beer. But make sure not to run, or you might get kicked out. If you kicked out, everyone loses and you have to start over at a new location.

5) Read a Book:
This one is simple enough. Reading never hurts, only helps. Plus it can be fun. If you're looking for a place to start, go back to the books you were supposed to read in high school. Or, if you still are bored with those, trying starting a trendy series that you've always been adamantly against. Harry Potter, Twilight, Lord of the Rings, etc.


So there it is ladies and gents. Five cheap ways to have a more exciting summer. So get off your butts, put down the remote and get out there to have some fun.

Come back next week, because I know that Wednesdays are the highlight of everyone's summer...

American Idol, America's Got Talent, America's Confused

The most popular show of the past several fall and spring television seasons is without question American Idol. And logically, the most popular show of the summer has been America's Got Talent. Both offer everything someone could want in a TV show: drama, laughter, emotion, competition, etc. What more could a person ask for when choosing what program to watch two or three nights a week? Oftentimes I find myself being sucked in to these reality shows and latching on to one of the competitors and cheering for him or her throughout the season. (Oftentimes really means the second season of American Idol. Big Ruben fan. Big Clay hater. Look at those two now. Look at me now. Need I say more?)

But in reality (Get it?), I do end up watching a few episodes of these two shows every season. And every time I find myself sad when I see the people that fall somewhere between incredible and awful. These people, for the most part, think they have some sort of ability to wow the world. It's understandable that not everyone will be a superstar, but the folks that genuinely think they have a shot and are brutally shot down by Simon or worse, David Hasselhoff leave me with a rather empty feeling.

For example, a few seasons back on American Idol, a girl in her early 20's had made it to Hollywood. She assumed she was well on her way to instant stardom á la Kelly Clarkson or Chris Daughtry. But after getting to Hollywood she was quickly let go and told she didn't have what it takes. Of course everyone's favorite worthless human, Ryan Seacrest was quick to track her down and chat with her before she could head back to wherever she hailed from. In her exit interview she expressed to millions that she had given up everything to be on American Idol. She had quit her job and was sure she could win it all. She just wanted to provide a nice life for her daughter and just knew this was her ticket to stardom. Of course like millions, she didn't win and who knows where she is these days. But the chord that struck most deeply with me was when she said, "I have no idea what I am going to do now."

These shows give our country, and for the most part the rest of the world, the impression that everyone has a shot at stardom, which I guess is somewhat true (see Hillary Duff), but it also gives us the impression that it's easy to attain said stardom. It's not. They show the fabulous people and the wretched people on American Idol and America's got talent. The fabulous ones woo us and the bad ones make us laugh. However, they rarely show the decent ones or the moderately good ones. These are the real people that this show affects. These are the people whose family and friends have encouraged them, whose teachers have let them miss class, whose bosses have given them time off to fulfill their dreams, and who ultimately are let down, and return, a little disheartened to say the least, to the daily grind.

In the case of the aforementioned girl though, she had given it all up. There was no return to her job or school. She was so sure that she could win that she threw away any hope of going back to a normal existence. And unfortunately was left in worse shape than when she came. At least she had hope when she set out to win. Sure, she could try again the next year, but we all know it probably won't ever happen for her.

So we (America) sell this notion of the American Dream that is not at all what it used to be. The American Dream once was earning a living, being grounded, caring about others and making something out of yourself (see Abraham Lincoln or Martin Luther King Jr.), but now it's becoming the next one hit wonder or the next flavor of the week for US Weekly or People. Unfortunately the majority of my generation has very little idea that happiness doesn't have to mean being rich or famous or the winner of American Idol, so many of us give up working to achieve happiness or our goals on the hopes that a one in a billion shot could happen. Not everyone can be an American Idol, and in the case of Ruben, not every winner will stick around for more than a few weeks, but we continue to give up education or our jobs to give it a shot.

I'm really not trying to say don't follow your dreams, but I am trying to say that there are better ways to achieve these dreams than giving up everything else to have a snotty Brit tell you you're worthless or a former Baywatch star sound a buzzer to let you know he doesn't like what you have to offer while you give it your all (assuming you actually interact with these famed judges and not just some panel of no names). Dreams are important, but to think that you can give up the things in life that provide stability and a future for yourself in the hopes of winning a reality show is not the way to realize your wishes. Work hard, go to school, find a job, take care of your family. If you want to be a star, figure out a way to get yourself out there, but don't settle to have your spirit crushed by what America says is instant ticket to stardom these days.

On a more positive note, here is an example of a feel good story from one of the discussed programs. The guy you will see here is a class act and has made Mississippi proud. Thanks Lawrence. Thanks for showing us that following your dreams doesn't always end in heartbreak and also for showing us that there are more important things in the world than fame and fortune, like really loving what you do and doing it well.

The Passing of an Icon and His Practical Canonization

I know that I will probably receive some heat for this one, but I can deal with that...

Michael Jackson died. It was a day that nearly everyone will remember for the rest of his or her life. I was sitting at my kitchen table and it was the headline on commercialappeal.com. I yelled to my mother to inform her of the sad news and was met with nothing but a shocked, "wow." Within moments every television station and radio station was covering the ground breaking news.

So here we are five days later. What have we seen since then? Where do we go from here? How many tribute songs, albums, television specials and concerts will follow in the next year?

I really only want to tackle the backlash that has followed such a momentous occasion in entertainment history. As for where we should go from here and the tribute stuff, you can deal with that on your own.

I remember vividly watching The Jacksons: An American Dream on vh1 almost every summer from 1995 to 2000 and being completely enthralled with the whole messed up story. Michael's rise to fame was fast and interesting to say the least, but the man that passed away last Friday was not the same little boy that grabbed the nation's heart with his four brothers in the 1970's and continued to hold onto it as he thrilled us throughout the 80's and early 90's. It is very apparent (unless you've lived under a rock for most of your life) that something went bad wrong somewhere along the journey from magnificent to maniacal.

There's really no point in discussing how incredible Michael's dance moves and singing and writing and entertaining were. If you've watched TV over the past few days, you've seen plenty of that. What I really want to discuss is how his death can nearly wipe his very dirty slate clean.

It seems that in the wake of Jackson's passing, millions have ignored or forgotten the inexplicable things he did as his career and life spiraled downward. I understand that it is really sad for the music and entertainment industry to lose such a phenomenal performer, but should we just excuse his actions and deeds because of his death? Should we completely shrug off that time he grinned and held his own child over a high-rise balcony as a publicity stunt? Is it fair to act as if he never acted inappropriately when he was around young children? I mean, in all seriousness, these are things that were very real and very disturbing to say the least.

Over the past few years, Jackson fled the United States after being charged with seven counts of child sexual abuse and administering intoxicating drugs to the victim to perform the lewd acts. While he was cleared for these certain crimes, it is hard to dismiss all the other rumors and accusations that were directed at him for the better part of the 1990's and early 2000's.

Do these things not disgust and repulse us as a society? Should his career be enough for us to forget these things? I personally still appreciate his music as I listen to it while writing this and have listened to it extensively over the past week. I appreciate his innovation for dancing and his ability to entertain billions of people. But I can't find it ok for millions if not billions to act as if the only man that died last Friday was the sweet boy from the Jackson 5 and the incredible dancer and singer from Bad, Thriller and Off the Wall. The dark side of Jackson died Friday as well, and it's not fair to honor him in such a way as so many have without first considering the objectionable acts he committed in the waning years of his storied life.

The same principle rings true for Elvis, Marilyn Monroe, John Lennon and Jimi Hendrix. We should value these people as entertainers, storytellers and performers, but just because they have passed on does not mean that they have become saints and have escaped their pasts. I don't want to vilify Jackson with this piece. I just want to be honest with my opinion. We can't simply turn our heads to some aspects of a life and lift up others. That's not fair to anyone.

But, as far as giving my honest opinion goes...

He really was awesome at what he did.