TV to Movie Wishlist

Remember a few years back when someone had the grand idea to cast Nicole Kidman and Will Ferrell in a remake of the classic TV show Bewitched? Well, I never saw it but I heard it was pretty wretched.

Of course making movies from television programs isn't a new concept. See: The Fugitive, The Brady Bunch, Wayne's World, Transformers, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, Starsky and Hutch and Mission Impossible. But when Bewitched came on TBS the other night (again I didn't watch it) it got me thinking about other classic shows I would like to see made into feature films.

Here are a few ideas. Let's take a gander...

1) M*A*S*H:

This is kind of a tricky one because it was a movie first and then a TV show and now I want it to be a movie again. But the idea seems feasible. Over the past fifteen years we've seen countless movies about war, ranging from Saving Private Ryan for WWII to this year's The Hurt Locker depicting action in the current war with Iraq. Point being, war movies are a dime a dozen. But we rarely see military flicks that are designed to make us laugh. M*A*S*H would fill that void, a void that is in dire need to be filled in a time where the general opinion of war separates one half of the population from the other. Maybe a funny movie on the subject would lighten the mood a bit.

Any-who, let's look at the potential dream cast for this one. I feel like pulling from the so called "Frat Pack" aka 'The Apatow Army" would be a wise call as they seem to be able to turn anything into box office gold. Alan Alda's character Hawkeye would be a great fit for Paul Rudd. Wayne Rogers' Trapper McIntyre would of course be handed to Will Ferrell (hopefully it will work out better than the aforementioned Bewitched) or Seth Rogen. Radar O"Reilly, formerly played by Gary Burghoff, would be nice for Jason Alexander, but he might be a bit old these days so perhaps Jason Schwartzman. And of course, there's Maxwell Klinger, the sergeant who attempted over and over again to be discharged for psychological reasons by dressing in girl's clothes. I'm thinking Michael Cera. Finally, the draw for the male crowd ages 14-27, the sex symbol of the show, Hot Lips Houlihan. The options are endless for this one. They could go over the top with a Jenny McCarthy or Pamela Anderson type. It could be more subtle a la Kate Hudson or Christine Taylor. Or it could be a choice a little left of center with a striking, fine female like Blake Lively. Pick a few of my choices for the cast of the new M*A*S*H and you're sure to have success.

2) Sanford and Son:

There are millions out there that want this one. I just have that feeling in my gut. If you're not familiar with the show, it chronicles the story of a father and son's life in urban Los Angeles. The father, Fred, played by Redd Foxx, was a junk dealer and his son Lamont, played by Desmond Wilson owned half of the junk business, but Sanford was the boss. Son was the worker.

In a fantasy world, or at least my fantasy world, this would be the perfect film for Will Smith and Morgan Freeman to collaborate on. If Freeman could be as sassy as Foxx was on the show, it would work out well. But to sell two huge actors on this would be tough. It might work with Smith portraying the elder Sanford with an up and coming black actor as Lamont. Maybe Nick Cannon or Columbus Short of Stomp the Yard fame.

There's a lot that could be done with this one. I'm optimistic about it. We'll see what happens. And if done correctly, it could be as funny as men getting hit in the crotch.

3) All in the Family:

Practically the same show as Sanford and Son except it appealed to white people. Blue collar family struggling to make it pretty much sums it up. Throw John Goodman in as Archie Bunker, Roseanne Barr in as Edith, and... wait they did that as a different show with the exact same concept. Nevermind. Scratch that.


And last but not least...

4) Taxi:

A great show from the late 70's and early 80's that must be remade for the silver screen. Judd Hirsch, Christopher Lloyd, Andy Kaufman, Jeff Conaway, Tony Danza, Marilu Henner and Danny DeVito. What A-list Hollywood stars wouldn't want to play these small screen legends as they try to retell the story of a New York taxi company?

Put Jeff Goldblum in the lead as the serious cabbie, Alex Rieger because everyone is eagerly anticipating Goldblum's comeback. Tom Hanks might be more of a draw, but I vote for Jeff. Then take Jerry Seinfeld and let him portray Kaufman's crazy Latka. Mix in a little bit of Sean William Scott for Reverend Jim Ingnatowksi, the recovering drug addict. And round out the cast with Owen Wilson as Bobby Wheeler, the wannabe actor, Jason Alexander (yes again) as Louie De Palma, the overbearing dispatcher, and finally Julia Roberts as Elaine Nardo, the struggling artist and single mother of two. Let's be honest, nobody wants to play the role that Tony Danza once had so we'll leave that one for Matt Leblanc.

With that cast, this movie cannot be stopped. Watch out Titanic, here comes the Taxi.

So those are just a few of my favorite options for movies I'd like to see that were once beloved television programs.

Here are some honorable mentions:
Mork and Mindy
Gilligan's Island
All in the Family (seriously)
The Facts of Life
Welcome Back Kotter
The Wonder Years (perhaps a bit too soon)
Laverne and Shirley
Happy Days (I think it was called Grease and has already been remade though.)

If you've ever seen any of the shows I've mentioned, you understand. However, if you haven't, one day you will be sitting in a theater watching a screening of M*A*S*H or Sanford and Son and you will want to see them in their original form, on the small screen.

Until next time, pleasant viewings.